Beth M. Broom, LPC-S, CCTP-II
As a counselor I spend a lot of time helping my clients understand their own emotional states and how those states interact with their thinking patterns and bodily responses. Sometimes it’s hard for clients to understand these concepts, especially if they are not used to noticing what’s happening inside when situations are difficult. I’d like to talk you through a way we can help sufferers learn to gauge their emotions using the simple imagery of a thermometer.
Oftentimes when using the thermometer analogy, people talk about states as if the ideal ‘temperature’ is zero: “On a scale from 0-10, with 10 being enraged or panicked, where are you?” There’s a potential problem with using the scale in this way. Using the scale in this way does not take into account the possible spectrum of responses. For example, where do you place emotions such as disappointment, embarrassment, or loneliness? These emotions might not feel like heightened states to the sufferer, which means she may not account for them when using a scale from 0-10.
I prefer to use the thermometer as we use it in real life. The “ideal temperature” falls somewhere in the middle of the scale, rather than at the bottom end. I’ll give you an example of how I talk about this with a client:
“I’m going to use the symbol of a thermometer to help us talk about how you’re feeling, what you’re thinking, and what’s happening in your body. The two ends of the thermometer represent states that create potential negative impact, and the middle represents our ideal ‘temperature.’
“If you’re all the way at the top of the thermometer, we would say you’re ‘burning.’ This happens when you feel enraged or absolutely panicked. You may notice that you’re jittery, agitated, or hyper-alert, and you may feel out of control like you’re going to explode. We might put that number between 100-200 degrees. Below that is the ‘hot’ state. In this state you may feel irritated, anxious, or embarrassed. You may be restless or short of breath, and you might want to fight or run away. This temperature might be between 80-100 degrees.
The ‘cool’ state is our ideal state. It ranges between 50-80 degrees. In this state you’re alert, calm, and engaged. You may feel happy, content, or even excited. If you go below this state to a temperature between 30-50, you are in the ‘cold’ state. Here you may feel disappointed, lonely, or disengaged. You may be kind of ‘blah’ and not have a lot of motivation. But if you sink into the range of 0-30, you’re ‘freezing.’ In this state you may feel completely numb or blank. You may feel helpless or hopeless, which can cause you to feel isolated from others.”
After I explain the thermometer, I ask the client to think about times when she felt these particular ways. We write down some examples, and I ask her what she has done that has helped her in each state. We write down some strategies she can try when she’s in each state. She’s also able to share how it feels to move between states. I mention that one of our goals is to make the ‘cool’ state as large as possible so that when difficult situations occur, she can remain regulated. This leads us to talking about how to cope well with stressors, including spiritual, mental, emotional, and bodily strategies for stress management. I also teach her how to slow down in any given moment and take her temperature so that she can discern what strategies to employ.
I find that this exercise helps all kinds of clients, but particularly clients who have experienced shame as a result of their fluctuating states. Using this tool allows them to recognize that changes in states can happen for lots of different reasons, and we are not powerless against the emotions that come when difficulty arises. In addition, children and teens are helped by this tool because it’s simple to learn and put into practice.
Once a client has begun to understand what’s happening inside, she is better equipped to access wisdom in difficult situations. She can notice that she is starting to ‘heat up,’ and she can take a breath and remember that she is not alone. She can pray or call to mind the imagery of Jesus as her good shepherd. She can recall God’s love for her, and she can ask for prayer and help from others. When I talk with her about ideas for how to remain regulated when stressors happen, I am helping her ‘rehearse’ a wise response. If she has rehearsed it, she’s more likely to use it when it’s needed.
I have developed a worksheet that includes the thermometer with explanations of the various states, and it also includes some questions the sufferer can answer in order to rehearse wise responses to stressors. This tool is available for free on our website by clicking HERE.