Beth M. Broom, LPC-S, CCTP-II
If you work with people who are suffering, you will be affected by their pain. In fact, being affected by the pain of others is one of the qualities that make us good caregivers. If we were unaffected, we would not be motivated to help. This is the nature of compassion. We are moved to action because of the suffering of another person.
Jesus exhibited this compassion beautifully when he walked the earth. He sat with those who were confused and listened to their struggles. He healed those who were wounded and diseased. He taught about the coming of God’s kingdom to those whose hope was faltering. He fed the hungry. The work we get to do as counselors, pastors, ministers, and fellow believers in Christ mirrors the heart of our Great Shepherd.
I think sometimes we can see our human limitations as sinful, believing that we would be able to do more and work harder if we were stronger or better Christians. This just is not the case. We are ambassadors and stewards of the gospel of Jesus, but we are also humans. We cannot work continually without rest. We are not designed to perpetually bear the burdens of others. Even Jesus needed to pull away from his ministry and rest. He acknowledged his human limitations and took care of himself so that he could persevere in the work God had called him to do. When we refuse to acknowledge our needs and weaknesses, we are destined to function in pride. We forsake dependence on the Holy Spirit and operate in our own strength.
Hebrews 12:1 reminds us that we need to throw off the things that hinder us and forsake the sin that entangles us. What are the things that hinder us? What sin might be seeking to entangle us? In every area of our lives, there are potential pitfalls and snares. We need to notice the behaviors that we are exhibiting because these behaviors can point us toward deeper attitudes and beliefs in our hearts. In doing this, we are following Jesus’ instruction in Matthew 7:15-20 to judge the tree by the fruit we can see.
I have created a free tool to help you assess your physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual, and professional health. Click HERE to access it. You can use it for yourself and offer it to those you serve. This tool can lead you to notice areas of life that may be unhealthy. If you check several boxes in a particular area of health, you may want to talk with a pastor, counselor, or trusted friend about steps you can take toward healing and growth. You may need someone else to help you create goals and checkpoints for your health and well-being.
But I also want to mention something really important for those of us who serve trauma survivors. When we hear terrible stories and spend time with people who are wounded, we can be affected in very deep ways. Their stories and experiences can sometimes ‘stick’ to us, and we find ourselves immersed in someone else’s life. We can start to feel afraid even when there’s no apparent danger, and we can begin to question ourselves, other people, and even God. These are very important signs to notice because they could indicate Secondary Traumatic Stress (STS). Secondary Traumatic Stress is “the emotional duress that results when an individual hears about the firsthand trauma experiences of another. For therapists, child welfare workers, case managers, and other helping professionals… the essential act of listening to trauma stories may take an emotional toll that compromises professional functioning and diminishes quality of life”
(https://www.nctsn.org/trauma-informed-care/secondary-traumatic-stress). The symptoms are similar to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder: avoidance, intrusions, and heightened responses to distress. These symptoms can have long-lasting negative effects on us and on those we serve if left unnoticed and untreated. They can manifest in our day-to-day lives with our loved ones, and they can affect how we cope with stressors and view our work and relationships. They can even lead to burnout.
What we need most is the strength and mercy of the Lord. We also need each other. We are never meant to serve in isolation. And we need intentionality in our times of rest, in our friendships, and in our self-care. We need to approach our weaknesses and human limitations with compassion, humbly entering God’s throneroom to ask for what we need. He is the author of compassion, and he is sure to have compassion on us as we draw near to him.
I have created a self-assessment tool for helpers to gauge Secondary Traumatic Stress, and this tool is available to CTHN members. Click HERE to access it. If you are exhibiting symptoms of STS, please talk with a trained professional who can help you implement tools for staying healthy as you serve others.
